A new study from the Office of Federal Understanding & Capitalist Kinship (O.F.U.C.K) has concluded that women should play advertisements against their tummies during pregnancy as it is very ‘soothing’ …
Local Town Rejoices as Couple Reach Silver Anniversary without Infidelities
Around 200 people gathered at the local town hall in Lipsterton, Kent, where it is reported that a couple, Mr & Mrs Kenwright-Bailey, have reached their 25th wedding anniversary, without …
Internet Trolls are all Actually Just Bored City Bankers
According to a recent web analytics report from stealyourdata.com, the majority of internet trolls are actually just bored city bankers whose other leisure activities no longer interest them. “I used …
Fat People Officially ‘Taking the Piss’
A new survey from the office of national surveys has ascertained the collective mentality of the nations fats, and that they are actually, ‘taking the piss’. “I’ve been taking the …
Christians Report That ‘God Was About To Perform Miracle Before Human Intervention’
A new statement from the Christian church has announced that God was about to save that boy from getting hit by a car, before some mindless human bystander intervened. An …
Celtic’s Perfectly Executed ‘Kansas City Shuffle’
Celtic have again been rewarded for a flawlessly executed tactic of misdirection which has seen their team edge closer to Champions League qualification. Legia Warsaw have been dumped out of the …
Tiger Woods Back Problems Definitely all Golf Related…
Tiger Woods has a long history of back problems which are definitely all related to the high intense sport which is his profession. And nothing else… His latest injury setback has …
Mourinho ‘had’ to Re-sign Drogba to Obtain Key to Secret WAG Porn Stash
Jose Mourinho ‘had’ to re-sign Didier Drogba for Chelsea, as apparently the 36 year old striker was the only one who knew the 4 digit PIN code to the secret WAG …
Foxes Celebrate a Decade of ‘Free Reign’ with Booze and Drugs Parties in City Streets
Foxes all over England have been celebrating the impending anniversary of the fox hunting ban with a traditionally urban booze and drugs orgy. It has been almost ten years since the ban and …
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