Category: Foreign Affairs
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‘Sydney Siege’; Retail Giants Battle For Sponsorship Rights To Hostage Situation
In the wake of the news that a suspected IS affiliated gunman held hostages in a cafe in Sydney’s CBD, retail Giants Wal-Mart, Amazon & Target have all been quick to bid for exclusive sponsorship of the siege. Whilst many people across Australia and the rest of the world have been compassionate and loving in…
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US Gun Lobbyists Call For Ban On Toy Guns
Following the tragic shooting of a 12 year old boy in Cleveland, Eugene Lardbutt, President of G.O.N.A.D.S (Gun Owners of North America Demand Slaughter), has slammed the plastic toy gun industry as being the cause of yet another needless fatality. The 12 year old was opened fire on by trained police officers with real guns…
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UN Decides the Path to World Peace Requires More War
In light of increasing tension in the Middle East and Ukraine, the United Nations held an emergency summit yesterday at which they decided that world peace could only be attained by increasing the number of wars. “There is no greater influence for peace than the prospect of war.” Comments British Envoy to the UN, Marshall…
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George W Bush Declares Overthrowing Saddam was a ‘Whoopsie!’
Full-time oxygen thief George W. Bush has joked that the war in Iraq was “stupid now I think about it”. The retired two-term president spoke from his ranch in Texas this week, as violence continues to intensify in Iraq, with ISIS forces slaughtering hundreds of innocent Iraqi’s in cold blood. He mused that “it turns…
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Everyone ‘Must Pick a Side’ in Relation to the Gaza Conflict
Pro-Palestinian and Pro-Israeli supporters rallied together to lynch a group of people who refused to take sides in the Gaza conflict, unconfirmed sources have rumoured. One of the supporters stated, “We might hate them and they might hate us, but that’s nothing compared to the hate we have for someone who doesn’t hate anyone.” “Just…